December 02, 2012

Everything Is Illuminated.

As we step into December, the weather has turned bitterly cold and the first snow of the season has fallen - as if on cue - with the onset of the first winter month.
Embarking on my long commute after work the other day, three hours into a dark winter evening, I left the traffic of a busy metropolis behind and set out onto the deserted freeway. Driving along, I experienced a sudden sense of enchantment.
The darkness subsided and the full moon peaking occasionally through the clouds cast an alluring silver light onto the road ahead, while my favorite musical piece kept playing in the background.

I felt as if suddenly everything was illuminated.

Thus yet another unforgettable moment formed in my perception - an occurrence that is fairly common these days.

My dreams and hopes are all slowly become reality and the future indeed seems bright.
In a couple of months we will begin the process of moving into a new house - a place that will become our home.

Sitting in our lawyers office this past week, getting through the last administrative paperwork before signing the dead, my mind went through a short flashback to almost exactly a decade ago.
Seated in a similar office, in a another part of the country, I was signing a deed to my very first house, the white house on the hill, having an entirely different future planned ahead off me. I never thought then that ten years down the road I would be embarking on a novel journey once again. I find this to be the most alluring aspect of life - not knowing what the future holds.
One thing remains the same though - I feel equally excited about the prospect of the purchase as I did then. When we walked into our house for the first time, both me and my husband, without any communication between us, knew in our hearts we have found our home.

Giving in to the wave of changes, I have taken the decision to change my citizenship.
It is an important step, one that I take gladly, but one that is leaving me full of nostalgia.
I am giving up a country where I was not born and where I have not lived for over two decades, yet where I spend twelve very important and formative years. It is a country that took my family in and gave us shelter and a promise of a better future. It was where I spend a blissful childhood, where I went to school, where I had my first home and my first employment. It is where I made the friends I still have in my life and where the foundation was laid to who I am today.
Thus I take this step with a sense of apprehension, even though there is no doubt in my mind that my decision is the right one. After "belonging" to one country almost all my adult life, despite my many moves and relocation - I guess I have finally found a reason to belong elsewhere. I have found a reason to lay down my hat right here.
I have finally found my home.

Indeed, everything is illuminated, even though we are amidst the darkest time of the year. November noir has ended, becoming replaced by December brightness - not just defined by the shine of the full moon, but by all the twinkling, ornate lights adoring houses and lining the roads and the multitude of candles burned throughout the Scandinavian homes.
I have always loved this time of the year, when this undefined yet so tangible and unified joy settles all across my world.
Still, never before have I enjoyed the onset of the Holidays more than I do today.

Love, family and home - these are the blessings that define Christmas and currently these make up the very core of my life and are the shinning beacons that illuminated my heart. 
Each and every day is precious and even the darkest winter night is suddenly full of light.

21 comments :

Brian Miller said...

i have finally found my home....smiles...love that...some big things for you...a new home...a new country....and love by your man and his family....how cool is that...10 years makes all the difference eh? i am glad you are getting your hopes and dream zu...you def deserve them....smiles.

Deborah Jean at Dandelion House said...

Congratulations Zuzana on finding you home! I love new beginnings and yours sounds divine...! Thank you for stopping by to check on all of us at Dandelion House as we enter the month of " light "...
Hugs,xoxox

Kath said...

It all sounds just delightful, both exciting and contented, all at once. I could not be more happy for you, you deserve it all xx

Myrna R. said...

I'm so happy for you. It seems like this year is the year of change for you. Your whole life is full of light, to match your beautiful disposition and attitude. Congratulations on your new home. This is so exciting.

Roger Gauthier said...

What a wonderful writer you are, Zuzana. This is an enchanting story indeed, and I am so happy for you.

This is more than moving into a new house. It is almost like moving into a new life, in a way. I am happy to see you so happy. You've got a bright future awaiting you! :-)

ladyfi said...

Such a good motto - everything is illuminated! Love that moon shot.

I'm going to get Swedish citizenship - time for it now as it really feels like home.

A Lady's Life said...

It all sounds so nice and romantic and I hope it all works out for you.:)
It's so much easier than it is without family around I guess.
My son left our country to marry in Australia and as our family is small we are not very happy about this.
Family is very important in life especially the people who raised you and loved you.

Hilary said...

A big congrats to you in your dream home.. with your dream man.. in your dream life. :)

SandyCarlson said...

You give me hope on my birthday! You have me thinking there is more ahead where I have been thinking there is nothing. I am so happy for you and your new life in a new home.

Rahul Bhatia said...

Congratulations Zuzana to see your dreams comes true:)

Rajesh said...

Glad to know that you are going move into your dream space and your wishes are coming true.

Amanda said...

this sounds like a lot of changes are happening for you zuzana, but ones that you are embracing wholeheartedly, which is both wonderful and inspiring. i hope that your citizenship change goes well and the move to your new home goes smoothly. as a cancerian, i understand the difficulty in leaving something important behind so even though you are nostalgic, i applaud your courage to move boldly into the next exciting phase of your life.

with love,

amanda
xoxo

Zuzu said...

It brings me joy to read your words today, Zuzana! Much happiness to you & yours!
Hugs,
Zuzu

Jill from Killeny Glen said...

Reading this post makes me SO happy for you dear Zuzana! Oh, the journey you have made to find yourself HERE...a wonderful NEW chapter! I am excited to "see" your new home!

ENJOY!

Michael Manning said...

Very thoughtful and heartfelt, Zuzana! I wish you only the best as you begin a new chapter in your life. Just keep blogging so we can follow you ;) xoxoxo!

Donna said...

So much to look forward to. Congratulations on your new home, Zuzana! Wishing you all the best.

Hugs,
Donna

Draffin Bears said...

Hi Zuzana,

Beautiful writing today, I loved reading about life for you on the other side of the world.
Congratulations on your new home, wishing you all the best.
The moon photo is magnificent.

Hugs
Carolyn

Ash said...

I'm so happy for you, dear Zuz! Wishing you lots of happiness.

HUgs,
Ash

Tony said...

Encantado de haber pasado por aquí...felicitaciones y saludos Tony

Sharon Lovejoy said...

You are absolutely right. Zuzana, it seems like you have all your priorities in the right places.

Sending twinkling lights and warmth across the miles,

Sharon

Mimi said...

How did I miss this one?
Arrgh!
I love Hilary's comment, and echo her sentiments. I'm so pleased for you Zuzana, it seems that all the ducks have finally lined up for you, and all your dreams are coming through in a most wonderful way. Life can be good sometimes!